Counselor Magazine provides great information for not just counseling professionals, but anyone interested in the latest research and information available on addiction treatment.
In the article "The Science of Addiction: From Neurobiology to Treatment" (published July 12, 2008), Dr. Erickson explains why he dislikes the term “addiction” (short version — it’s unscientific, vague, and stigmatizing). He proceeds to make a convincing distinction between conscious drug misuse (he abhors the term “abuse”) and chemical dependence, which he characterizes as a brain disease involving impaired control over drug use. In this context, he cites ample evidence showing that chemical dependence is in fact a disease, and seems rather puzzled the issue is still disputed.
For more: http://www.counselormagazine.com/content/view/736/55/
The Science of Addiction: From Neurobiology to Treatment (W.W. Norton & Co., 2007).
Thursday, July 31, 2008
Thursday, July 24, 2008
Disclosure
Don’t Ask, Don’t Tell
When is it appropriate (or not) to tell someone that you have a history of drug and or alcohol abuse? Some sponsors will teach (preach) practicing “rigorous honesty,” having you tell everyone from your landlord to barista that you are a recovering addict/alcoholic.
However, opinions vary on what and when to disclose. Counselors and therapists are more likely to advise you to take an approach that acknowledges appropriate social boundaries, in a way that also respects your own sense of safety and asian_web.jpgevolving comfort level(s). When all is said and done, your relationships with others are entirely up to you. How you feel about your recovery will change over time. Do what feels right.
Here are some factors to take into consideration.
What is your relationship with that person?
While hiding the truth for personal advantage (such a misleading someone you are dating, so that they will like you better) is practicing manipulative behavior, telling your employer may not be the best idea. Not everyone “get’s it” and knowledge of your former addictions can bite you in the ass. There are areas of life that you may have more control over than others (i.e. job vs. personal relationships), so make it work for you in the way you best see fit. While we all would love to be great friends with our supervisors or co-workers, like sleeping with a roommate, sometimes it’s better to refrain. You’ll have to live with the consequences and others may not be as cool with things as you might hope. Or maybe they will. It’s your call.
How well do you know someone?
If you have just met someone, do you feel that they have the life experience or outlook that would allow for them to be non-judgmental and supportive of your personal history? Use your judgment. When you reveal too much about yourself too soon, others often find emotional and psychological misfortunes quite frankly, weird. When newly clean and sober our sense of timing is off. We are used to immediacy and false intimacy. In turn, beware of others who are interested in your drama. They need to go to Al-Anon.
Do you trust the person you are telling?
Human nature is tricky. Someone who you thought was your confidante, may turn and use your information against you. This may not necessarily be because they are a “bad” person, but perhaps there is fear around “difficult” and/or “emotional” issues. Fear causes people to stereotype and stigmatize. Mental illness is especially taboo in our culture and substance abuse, unfortunately, most often falls under this category.
“F” them if they aren’t cool with it! is a defense.
While this may make you feel better for awhile, this defense does not address the real problem, being: what do you think about yourself? Of course their judgment isn’t acceptable, but you also know more than they do. Society at large isn’t as well educated as a graduate from drug/alcohol treatment. Do you have feelings of disgust when you think of your friends who are still dealing/using? It is mortifying to know that others feel/felt this way about you. While we may not be spiritually advanced enough to immediately forgive, rather than acting like the angry drunk on the corner, think about how your defense may contribute to feelings of self-hatred.
You don’t know me…
When have you waited too long? Perhaps your particular type of relationship has not allowed for the subject to present itself. You might be a neighbor or co-worker, in which the topic has not arisen. Over time friendships develop and one assumes certain things about another’s identity. While you are no longer the person you used to be, when witness to a derogatory comment about someone with a “problem,” how do you handle this awkward moment? What if someone offers you a drink and the conversation steers headlong in that direction? Have you damaged your trust with someone who may feel, after an extended period of time, that you have been keeping a secret or mislead them?
Honesty can be the best policy.
Each situation is as unique as there are individuals. If you are in a better place, you will be interested in healthier people and attracting the same. We all have skeletons in our closets and if someone else has worked through their shit, they will not be judging you. You may be pleasantly surprised by some responses and even find that you earn another’s admiration and respect.
When is it appropriate (or not) to tell someone that you have a history of drug and or alcohol abuse? Some sponsors will teach (preach) practicing “rigorous honesty,” having you tell everyone from your landlord to barista that you are a recovering addict/alcoholic.
However, opinions vary on what and when to disclose. Counselors and therapists are more likely to advise you to take an approach that acknowledges appropriate social boundaries, in a way that also respects your own sense of safety and asian_web.jpgevolving comfort level(s). When all is said and done, your relationships with others are entirely up to you. How you feel about your recovery will change over time. Do what feels right.
Here are some factors to take into consideration.
What is your relationship with that person?
While hiding the truth for personal advantage (such a misleading someone you are dating, so that they will like you better) is practicing manipulative behavior, telling your employer may not be the best idea. Not everyone “get’s it” and knowledge of your former addictions can bite you in the ass. There are areas of life that you may have more control over than others (i.e. job vs. personal relationships), so make it work for you in the way you best see fit. While we all would love to be great friends with our supervisors or co-workers, like sleeping with a roommate, sometimes it’s better to refrain. You’ll have to live with the consequences and others may not be as cool with things as you might hope. Or maybe they will. It’s your call.
How well do you know someone?
If you have just met someone, do you feel that they have the life experience or outlook that would allow for them to be non-judgmental and supportive of your personal history? Use your judgment. When you reveal too much about yourself too soon, others often find emotional and psychological misfortunes quite frankly, weird. When newly clean and sober our sense of timing is off. We are used to immediacy and false intimacy. In turn, beware of others who are interested in your drama. They need to go to Al-Anon.
Do you trust the person you are telling?
Human nature is tricky. Someone who you thought was your confidante, may turn and use your information against you. This may not necessarily be because they are a “bad” person, but perhaps there is fear around “difficult” and/or “emotional” issues. Fear causes people to stereotype and stigmatize. Mental illness is especially taboo in our culture and substance abuse, unfortunately, most often falls under this category.
“F” them if they aren’t cool with it! is a defense.
While this may make you feel better for awhile, this defense does not address the real problem, being: what do you think about yourself? Of course their judgment isn’t acceptable, but you also know more than they do. Society at large isn’t as well educated as a graduate from drug/alcohol treatment. Do you have feelings of disgust when you think of your friends who are still dealing/using? It is mortifying to know that others feel/felt this way about you. While we may not be spiritually advanced enough to immediately forgive, rather than acting like the angry drunk on the corner, think about how your defense may contribute to feelings of self-hatred.
You don’t know me…
When have you waited too long? Perhaps your particular type of relationship has not allowed for the subject to present itself. You might be a neighbor or co-worker, in which the topic has not arisen. Over time friendships develop and one assumes certain things about another’s identity. While you are no longer the person you used to be, when witness to a derogatory comment about someone with a “problem,” how do you handle this awkward moment? What if someone offers you a drink and the conversation steers headlong in that direction? Have you damaged your trust with someone who may feel, after an extended period of time, that you have been keeping a secret or mislead them?
Honesty can be the best policy.
Each situation is as unique as there are individuals. If you are in a better place, you will be interested in healthier people and attracting the same. We all have skeletons in our closets and if someone else has worked through their shit, they will not be judging you. You may be pleasantly surprised by some responses and even find that you earn another’s admiration and respect.
Time is on Your Side
Time is on Your Side. It Really Is.
In early recovery time is an experience similar to looking into a distorted fun house mirror. What is being reflected back is contorted and estranged. We may not believe what we see and must be reminded that the garbled viewpoints of reality are being interpreted through a fragmented mind. Frighteningly enough, your warped perception may be somewhat accurate.
Time, in your addiction, is something to be obliterated. Days and years pass by with a lot of energy spent on suppressing thoughts of all that has been wasted. The cold reality of time in early sobriety seems unbearably harsh, which is why recovery rhetoric is filled with references to it (i.e. "One Day at a Time").
Such is the sick irony of being in rehab.
You're stuck without much to do but think over the drone of the clocks' ticking. Yet, as we step back, perceptions change.
This is where time comes into play. If you can wait, twists in the mirror begin to iron out, reflecting a more flattering image. As your mental health improves, you will gain a more realistic concept of time.
Prayer and meditation are relied upon heavily in the recovery world and with good reason. We need to slow down our thoughts and be aware of the minds desire to escape through rushed experience. Dealing with legal or financial issues and rebuilding personal relationships take longer than we think we can stand.
However, time passes no matter what. So if you are moving in the direction of recovery you will inevitably end up, over time, in a better place.
Friday, July 11, 2008
Rational Recovery
I recently came across "Rational Recovery" in the textbook "Drugs in Perspective" by Richard Fields. I searched the web and found the official Rational Recovery website, which calls itself a "portal to life after addiction-and to life after recovery". I found it curious that Rational Recovery was mentioned as a treatment option in the required text of an Alcohol and Drug Counselor Program, but was never discussed in the many recovery programs I had been involved with.
While very bias in his opinions, the founder Jack Trimpey explains his ideas in the following passage:
"It is tragic that the precious wisdom of the self-recovered has been obscured and replaced by the collective voice of those who remain in the state of addiction, people who who have not recovered, but are only "in recovery," engaged in a peculiar lifestyle that provides social support for tentative, one-day-at-a-time sobriety, and chastises more ambitious commitments" (Trimpey).
http://www.rational.org/why.html
While very bias in his opinions, the founder Jack Trimpey explains his ideas in the following passage:
"It is tragic that the precious wisdom of the self-recovered has been obscured and replaced by the collective voice of those who remain in the state of addiction, people who who have not recovered, but are only "in recovery," engaged in a peculiar lifestyle that provides social support for tentative, one-day-at-a-time sobriety, and chastises more ambitious commitments" (Trimpey).
http://www.rational.org/why.html
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